Bloggers have the choice as to what they share on their blog, it’s essentially their online diary that’s open for the public to read and later to comment upon. Thus, it’s easy for the life of a blogger to appear like daisies and roses, full of marvelous, fabulous, and wonderful experiences. But in reality, we’re all human and we all have our ups and downs, moments of laughter and frustrations, and last night I had my own.
I felt blindsided. It was literally moments after I hit publish after yesterday’s post, while I was enjoying the fire that Ryan had built. He was rooting for the Redskins and I was thinking about how marvelous our day date was at Wegmans and the movies. And then all of a sudden my smile turned into a frown and I wanted to crawl into a cave. I usually am so on top of things but this was something that was bigger than my color-coded planner. It was out of my control. I thought I knew but I was wrong. I felt embarrassed and hurt, humiliated and mortified.
But thankfully, I have a loving husband who stands by his vows “…to have and to hold from this day forward, for better or for worse, for richer, for poorer, in sickness and in health, to love and to cherish; from this day forward until death do us part.” He tried everything he could to make me shake it off and to move on. Despite his kind words and support, I spent last night and this morning pitying myself. I hardly slept due to my mind racing with worried thoughts. That is until after breakfast when I sat down and outlined a plan. If only I had done that 12 hours sooner.
It truly does not make a difference to y’all what happened [note: no one is or was hurt], but what does matter is what I’ve realized. We’re all human and we make mistakes. Surprises are just that, unpredictable and unforeseen events. I cannot always be in control, no matter how hard I try, somethings are out of my control. Mistakes are a part of learning. And like I said last week, one of my goals this year is to learn from my experiences. Without a doubt, I have learned A LOT from this experience and that is marvelous.
Every cloud has a silver lining.
Thank you Katie from Healthy Diva Eats for hosting another marvelous link-up!
I had sweeter, more marvelous thoughts on my mind for today’s Marvelous in My Monday post yesterday before this snafu happened, such as how my pancake obsession has transformed into an oatcake obsession, or how Charlie looks like a lemur because of his new haircut, or about what Ryan and I are planning to do on our honeymoon cruise, but those thoughts will be saved for a fluffier, less dense day 
Question: How do you deal with stressful situations?
Question: What’s marvelous about your Monday?
— Allison
lifesabowl
lifesabowl
lifesabowl
lifesabowl
lifesabowl
lifesabowl
I’m glad you were able to shake it off and still have a Marvelous Monday. You don’t deserve to stress a ton, regardless of what it was that happened. I’m glad nobody was hurt by whatever it was and that you’re moving forward. Love ya, girl!! I’m here if you need me
Thanks for the positive words and support girly! XO
You are so right that some things really are out of our control. The things we can’t control, it is even more up to us how we choose to deal with the situation and how to feel about it. It is so important in these situations that we have those rocks (your husband) to support us and make us remember that it will all be okay. Good for you for turning your thoughts around positively – 12 hours later is NOTHING girl, some people stay in funks for a long time. I hope everything works out (it always does) and my thoughts are with you. <3
Thank you so much for the well wishes girl! And you are so right about how important our reactions and responses to tough situations are…
Oh man! I hope whatever happened passes and you feel better soon!
Thanks so much girly!
Mistakes are never that, because they ARE just opportunities to learn, move forward and make the most of what comes next rather than worry about what’s in the past and unchangeable! I hope you’re feeling all good now (and focusing on that cruise!). Sending support and good thoughts your way!
You are totally right about that- you can’t change the past but can learn from the experience and do better in the future!
I’m sorry for the snafu & the downer on your day. I’m glad you’re able to get past it & that no one was hurt. Yes, we do all have those dark, sad, troublesome moments that we bloggers tend to keep quiet & to ourselves, but we’re only human & are allowed those moments too. Glad you were able to see a silver lining in it all. Happy Monday!
Thanks so much girl! Hope you’ve had a great week [with all of your nut butters]
Oh love, i have those days, too. Usually, if i can’t shake it off after a time, I go to bed as early as I can so i don’t say/do something I’ll regret and hurt someone in the process. Usually that does the trick…if it’s not enough, I’ll go for a run and if that doesn’t help i cry and ask for a hug…I’m glad you were able to shake it, love. Very marvelous indeed
Ugh, I wish I could fall asleep… When I’m stressed, sleep is the first thing that is affected [if it lasts all day] :/
You are so right to shake it off and move on. I used to worry so much about the littlest things and then I realized that too much time was wasted worrying about things I couldn’t change. It happens to us all and you’re stronger for moving on and realizing it’s not worth worrying about
Hope you had a wonderful Monday!
Exactly! I say it a lot but just need to remember that some things are totally out of my control and I can’t stress over those situations…
YOu are so lucky to have people like him in your life, I know sometimes I just need that reality check and grounding to stay in the moment. You keep him close! I hope today brightened for you, I know you made my day that much better
Thanks for all of your support girl!
I certainly have my fair share of stressful moments, and I have found that they are often a result of feeling a loss of control. This is something that I am continually working to improve. Thank you for sharing. It helps me to know that while I sometimes feel alone, I am not the only one experiencing these negative moments. Hopefully we can both learn from them and develop more positive and healthy ways of dealing with stress
.
Definitely! I think learning to deal with stress is an ongoing process, learn form the past and prepare for the future…
Oh, hun… I’m so sorry. I hope that everything is okay and that you’re feeling better. And I’m so glad that you have people like Ryan in your life to help you through those funks – you deserve all the happiness in the world. I used to have a crazy need to control everything around me, getting super stressed out whenever things wouldn’t go as I planned, but the more mistakes I made, the more I realized that the majority of things in life are beyond my control; and while that may be kind of upsetting at first, in the end it’s really actually quite freeing. All you can do is do your best, and even if things don’t work out according to plan, they always have a way of working out anyways… it’s never the end of the world
You are totally right about how a lot of things are out of control and I realize that, I just need to practice what I preach more often
And you’re right again, 12/21/12 has passed and we’re all still here- the world didn’t end!
Keep your head up girl! It seems like you’re staying grounded. That’s what’s most important. That and staying positive!
Thanks girl! The glass is always half full, no matter how hard it is to see that at the time…
Oh sweetie! I am so sorry you had a less than stellar evening last night, but I am happy you were able to figure out the problem & work through it. You are one lucky girl to have some a loving & comforting husband <3.
Thank youuu girly!
I’m sorry about whatever happened to you! It’s so hard when things happen that are out of our control, But I’m glad to see you’ve bounced back and staying positive. That’s all we can really do!
Definitely, no matter how hard it is to see the positive, it’s always there… Thanks girly!
Oh, no! I’m sorry to hear that you had a stressful evening, but I’m so glad that you were able to turn it around! I really do believe that situations are largely shaped by our attitudes and perceptions.
I completely agree! How we respond and react to situations is a big component…
It’s definitely easy to get overwhelmed and caught up in a mistake or something going wrong that’s out of your control. When it happens to me I try to step back and think about something else. Distract my mind somehow. I find that when I distance myself from whatever happened, I’m able to think more logically and clearly about it, and I’m not as upset.
That’s a great approach, but sometimes it’s hard to get to that comfortable point… Definitely something I need to work on!
I think it is so cool that you share truth and honestly about being human on your blog : ) Yes, we are all human and will have our funks at time to time. Great work accepting support from your husband and doing what you know will help you feel better.
Thanks so much for the positive words!
Ah hun, we all have those days. And I believe that stressing out so bad that it affects how we think just isn’t worth it. Like you said, there is only so much we can control. I saw some of this at Meghann’s wedding this weekend and really, you just have to focus on the good that is going on around you instead. It’s not easy, but it always feels so much better than stressing out.
As hard as it may be in the moment, there is always a positive… I hope you had a blast at the wedding!
Ugh I hate when I get into funks like this! Having someone there to help pull you out is such an amazing luxury. I usually try to go for a walk, but I like your idea of writing out a plan! I hope you are feeling MUCH better!
I love going for walks to clear my head too… But it was dark and cold outside and I don’t like going for walks at night haha, pansy!
So glad that you were able to move on! Sometimes time is really what will ease our anxiety in the end but I’m glad you had your husband to support you. It sounds like you went through something I went through a couple of months ago – that awful, hopeless feeling when you don’t think anything will get better, your stomach is in knots, that constant feeling like you’re going to cry is in the back of your throat. But remembering the marvelous is such a big part of trying to move forward. I found meditation helped me too. Yes, learning from all experiences can put a positive spin on each one you live, even if it starts as negative. Sounds like you’re well on your way!
Thanks for the positive thoughts girl! I hope that you’re in a better place now too
Moving on from a stressful event is extremely difficult to do for anyone, nonetheless someone who is a very tough judge and critic of their own behaviour. Therefore, 12 hours is much better than letting it hold you for a day or two or even a week. You accepted and you moved on with strength. I actually think it’s better that you took those 12 hours for yourself. We need time to feel our emotions sometimes too.
You know I think you’re a rockstar, keep pushing for more. xo
You are awesome, thank you so much for listening to me the other day! XO
I am the queen of being stressed out… Ugh. I’ve dealt with anxiety my whole life — it’s never easy.
One thing that I try to recommend to everybody (no matter if they have a “problem” or not), is to see a therapist. Seeing a therapist has changed my life so much. It’s one of the best thing that has ever happened to me. If you don’t already go to one, I really think that it can help. It can’t hurt!
Something that I learned at therapy is deep breathing. It sounds corny and is kind of annoying at first, but now I try to practice it every day (just lay down in the dark and breathe deeply for 5 minutes before bed — or, alternately, when you get up in the morning) and it really does help me.
I find that stretching can help, too, because my upper back always hurts when I’m stressed out. Hope that helped!
I used to see a therapist in the past and thought it was a tremendous help! I saw her when I needed to [for a "problem"] and then I continued to see her for a while after because it was nice having someone to talk to who I knew would respect my privacy and provide me with insight… She taught me a few different breathing techniques that at first I thought were crazy but I continue to use them today!
This post is incredibly true. I don’t know what happened but I am happy to hear that you were able to make it through the day with the love and support from your man. And you are right things are not always flowers and bunnies and happy, life is hard and it certainly throws you curve balls